It’s hard having a brother with cancer

Carter with his Uncle Kevin

Tonight, as Matt and I were getting Carter out of the bath and getting ready to change his Broviac dressing Bennett said something that made us sad. He said, “I wish I had liver cancer.” Our immediate response was to be mad and not allow Bennett to even speak those words. Then, Bennett and I went in the other room and got a chance to talk about it. I asked why he would feel that way. He said he didn’t know. And I asked if it was because Carter gets a lot of attention from Dad and me because we have to take care of his medicine and tubes, etc. Bennett said, “Yes, his tubes take so long to clean.” We reassured Bennett that he is the most amazing brother and most incredible 4 year old boy. And that Matt and I are so proud of him, and we truly are! We know it’s not easy to watch his brother go through this, and he’s allowed to have break-downs (as Matt and I have allowed ourselves to do). Cancer affects the whole family. And yes, we are getting through it and hopefully we’ll be closer and stronger in the end…but it’s a hard journey. Bennett’s comment made us sad. We hope he doesn’t feel that way often, but when he does feel that way we’re glad he says it.

Carter is still feeling well, and we are still waiting for that phone call. Bennett and Matt went swimming today, and later in the afternoon Uncle Kevin, Grammy and Denny came over to visit. We have to be cautious of who Carter is around, so he doesn’t get exposed to anything. We are not willing to risk having to walk away from another liver. So, extra precautions are being used and fully masked faces are common around our house when someone stops by. Some people have you take your shoes off when you come to their house, we have you wash your hands and put on a Mickey Mouse mask.